The Fermented Loaf

Like any bun in the oven, this baby took time and like any expectant mother, I have dreamed about this moment for months.  Well, really just one month 'cause this is just the beginning of my fermented adventures but there is nothing like observing growth and development happening before your very eyes. When a bread pops out of the oven, it's nothing short of a bundle of joy! Occasionally, I even swaddle it and parade it around the house like it's "show and tell". What can I say? It's a mother's love...

For me, bread equals passion and reminds me that Grain & Grain, my bread baking and spoon carving workshops, will likely exist again sometime in the future because it's hard to put passion to rest.  So, kneadless to say (see what I did there?!), bread and I have a bond that cannot be broken.  True love will pass the test of time and I am learning that time is for the taking, aging is not for the faint of heart, and old is equal to gold.  Fermentation is age-related glory and this little loaf gets a gold star for sure!

For the "how-to" back story I encourage you to start here.  It provides all the details on how to capture wild yeast and is an introduction to the world of sourdough.  Once your starter reaches maturity and the wild bacteria has true leavening potential, you will have bread beyond your wildest dreams.

Prep

• 1/2 cup flour
• 1/2 cup warm water
• 1/4 cup starter (recipe here)

In a large bowl mix the above ingredients making a levain then cover and let sit for an hour or two allowing the yeast to acclimate.

Make

• 3 cups flour (and then more for dusting as needed)
• 1/4 tsp. salt
• 3/4 cup warm water
• 1/8 cup of molasses (honey or maple syrup also work)

Directions

1. In the bowl with the starter, add the flour and the salt. (Do not stir).
2. In a separate bowl combine the water and molasses and stir thoroughly.
3. Add the water/molasses mixture to the bowl with the flour and mix with a wooden spoon till the dough starts to pull away from the bowl.
4. As the dough starts to come together, begin to knead it slightly with your hand and encourage it along.
5. Once you have a rough dough ball formed you can dump it onto a floured surface and continue kneading. (Note: if your dough is stiff and on the dryer side you may not require much surface flour but if it feels wet, more flour is necessary to keep it from sticking to your hands and your counter top).
6. Knead for a good 10 to 15 minutes to help develop the gluten.
7. Lightly oil a large bowl and place the dough inside, giving it a little toss to slightly coat all sides. Lay it to rest with the seam side down. Cover it with plastic wrap and leave to rest for 6-8 hours. (The wild yeast is less potent than commercial yeast, so time is truly necessary to allow the dough to double in size. I typically make this dough in the evening so I can let it rest overnight and bake it in the morning).

Bake

1. After the dough has doubled, remove it from the bowl and knead it again to degas the dough slightly, dusting with flour as necessary.
2. Shape the dough and place it on an inverted lid of a flat-top dutch oven (something like this). If you don't have this type of dutch oven you can place the dough in a greased bread pan or sheet pan alternatively without a "top".
3. Let it rise covered for another hour or until it doubles in size.
4. Preheat your oven to 500 degrees along with the bottom of your dutch oven which in this case will serve as your "top".
5. When the oven is up to temperature, score your loaf with afew decrative slashes then carefully remove the dutch oven "top" and place it over the dough so the loaf is now inside the dutch oven.
6. Carefully place the inverted pot into the oven and bake for 30 minutes.
7. After 30 minutes, reduce the temperature to 450 degrees, remove the "top" and continue baking for more 15 minutes uncovered, or until the internal temperature reaches 190 degrees.
8. Cool on a rack for an hour before slicing.

*Note: If you are using a bread or sheet pan, you can mimic these results by preheating a baking pan on the lowest oven rack. After you score the bread, place it immediately in the oven and add two inches of water to the baking pan. This will create steam which helps contribute to the crispy crust. Bake for 10 minutes then remove the pan of water and lower the temperature to 375 degrees. Bake for an additional 25-30 minutes or until the internal temperature reaches somewhere between 180-190 degrees.

As a final addition I like to brush the top with butter.  This brings out the sheen in the crust and also adds a little flavor.  I mean, you can't go wrong with butter right?

Recipe for Pork Dumplings

Ok, technically these are potstickers!  The difference between "dumplings" and potstickers comes down to how they are cooked and where they are from. The  concept of dumplings exists across many cultures so things can get a little confusing but let's not complicate things.  Just get to making them and worry about what they are called later.  Once you master the technique you can stuff whatever you want inside, creating a cultural fusion if you like, feeling out your own rogue style that is beyond labeling them anything other than delicious.  So onward friends, and make kitchen magic!

Ingredients

• 1 pack of Goyza wrappers if not making your own.
• 1/4 to 1/2 head of thinly sliced cabbage
• 1 lb ground pork
• 1/2 cup sliced scallions
• 1 small diced hot pepper (I used a Thai red chili but a jalapeno could easily work)
• 2 cloves minced garlic
• 1 inch of ginger peeled and minced
• 1/4 cup finely chopped cilantro

Fill Directions

1. Place the sliced cabbage in a bowl, salt it well and leave it to rest for 20 minutes.
2. In another large bowl combine all the other ingredients and mix to combne.
3. After 20 minutes sqeeze out the excess water in the cabbage as best you can and then add the cabbage to the bowl with the other ingredients and mix well.
4. Pace about 1 tbsp on each goyza wrapper, wet the edeges and fold over sealing the edges by pinching the sides together starting with the outsides and moving toward the middle, placing each finished dumplin on a plate or baking sheet off to the side.
5. Continue until you have run out of wrappers, filling, or you are just over it for the day. It can be time consuming so don't hesitate to enlist help.

Cook Directions

1. In a non-sick fry pan heat a tbsp of oil.
2. Place dumplings one at a time close together in a circle all facing the same direction with the pinched side up.
3. Let it get a good fry going without moving. Then carefully add 1/2 cup of water to the center of the pan and cover so the dumplings can steam.
4. Check on them after a few minutes when the sizzle has calmed down. At this point you might decide more water is needed so they can keep steaming. (This will depend on the size of your pan/batch).
5. After several minutes of steaming and the dumplings are cooked through you can carefully remove them to a plate. A fun trick is find a plate or platter larger than your pan. Place it over the pan and carefully flip them out. With a little adjustment they will maintain the ring shape so you can house your dipping sauce right in the center... A presentation crowd pleaser!

Sauce Directions

• 1/4 cup soy sauce
• 1/4 cup rice vinegar
• Juice of 1/2 lime
• 1 tbsp honey
• clove garlic minced
• 1 tsp finely chopped cilantro
• 1/4 tsp crushed red pepper flakes (optional)

Combine all the ingredients and mix well. Adjust slightly for taste.

If you are feeling intimidated by the folding process or want to make your own wrappers, I encourage you to watch this video.  As a lover of all things dough and a desire to explore the tactile side of this dish, I was slightly obsessed with the first four minutes.

Good luck!

Sundowning & Cinching

My latest hang-up is with Sundown Syndrome.  Sundowning is the term or condition used to describe late day confusion, agitation, and restlessness typically associated with seniors with some form of dementia.   As nightfall approaches the mood in the house changes.  It's my least favorite time of day, where the energy seems to creep with a menacing edge.  My mom gets restless and antsy.  She routinely packs her things and gets temperamental about going "home".  My dad's version is different.  He gets frustrated by everything, curses frequently, and is generally ornery.  All it takes is one false move and the whole house topples into arguing about things that don't make any sense because, well, dementia and Alzheimer's don't make sense.

If you look hard enough, you can find an explanation for everything.  The idea that a concept doesn't make sense is not something culturally we know how to embrace.  Instead we often pick it apart so that we can digest "why".  But why is that? Why can't unexplainable phenomenons exist to defy the comforts of closure and instead lend themselves to the lesson that we don't have to know everything.  We don't need to define our existence with scientific explanations, standardized testing, and the evaluation of quantified data merely to plot a point somewhere on a spectrum.  As much as the identifying knowledge can provide a basis for moving forward, it seems to equally result in a platform to unfairly categorize, label, and make projections on just about any dichotomy. Specifically, normal verse not.

  Is the classic example of Sundowning that much different from what a tired baby experiences around bedtime?  Or the toddler who wants to stay up later and fights you on it even though you yourself know exhaustion is near? Fast forward a few years and think about the frustration, exhaustion, or maybe even the depression you might feel when a day escapes you and you have nothing to show for it.  

I often experience this pensive energy within myself.  It's a general dissatisfaction for things as the day comes to a close where for whatever reason I am moody.  Nothing seems right, no person can fix it, and the upside is the sole fact that sleep will come soon and I can wash myself of this feeling and start fresh again tomorrow.  But then tomorrow comes...  It's all rosy and promising till about noon and suddenly the race is on to accomplish something, anything, so that I might release the burden of my own feelings of life being so lack luster.  This is an absolute case of the blahs.  A shrink would likely label this as depression perhaps with an expensive RX to go with it but what the shrinks don't know is the definition of "cinched".  How do I explain what cinched is when the word itself is not text book material and just some street slang colloquialized by my old roommate?  I am not depressed.  I am just cinched, and the recipe for curing cinching is productivity, accomplishment or exercise as a last-ditch effort to feel different. Now, I am not saying that depression isn't a thing.  It most certainly is and "cinched" falls somewhere on the depression spectrum regardless of the word's actual formality.

My point is we probably all suffer from "sundowning" as the hard wiring of our neurology adjust to the earthly biorhythms that can disrupt circadian rhythm. A day turns to night, summer gives way to winter, and the ocean ebbs and flows.  Our internal clocks must adjust to effectively adapt and at times it's not so easy.  What's to say that sundowning is nothing short of normal considering a senior's loss in mobility and capacity to act on intention.  Seriously, where would we be and what would we talk about without the concept of goals?  As caregivers maybe our job is to provide more stimulus, more activity and help create a sense of accomplishment for the "given" so that they might sink into a rewarding night's sleep and remember that there is no place else they would rather be.

A Rhyme Within Reason

Is it just me, or are we all searching for something?  And by something I mean it in that grander, life's purpose kind-of way that has us all itching for a magic key that unlocks contentment. Contentment, different from "settled" yet settled in a way that allows the passing of each day feel gratifying, accomplished and with the favor of satisfaction that feels like we have earned it.  This is an annoying and haunting itch that scratches away reason and leaves a paranoid residue that times-a-wastin'.

I feel like I have spent so much time chasing down dreams, anxious to get on to the next thing only to wind-up lost and confused as I circle back to some original thought that I have long but abandoned.  And now, as I transition into this role of "caretaker" this cyclical pattern repeats, again, only this time distraction waits at a distance.  Without the flurry of my life's former routine I am forced to address circumstance while equally measuring possibility against the culmination of my experiences, skills, and abilities.  

I know I am smart.  This confusion isn't a matter of insecurities.  I have an undergraduate degree in Human Development and Learning from East Tennessee State University.  I have a master's degree in Central and Eastern European Studies from the prestigious Jagiellonian University in Krakow, Poland with a concentration in social transformation.  I am a Certified Natural Chef thanks to the Nutrition Therapy Institute and upon graduation landed an amazing gig with the Sea Education Association.  There has been no shortage of education or adventure, so like I said, my floundering is not a matter of insecurities. 

All of these things stack nicely in the job department but when you are a caregiver it doesn't matter much.  That dream job within grasp is an illusion because obligations on the home-front come first.  Try explaining that to your would-be employer.  Can you tell I have entered a deep pondering phase?   And it's one thing to ponder the future but it's quite another to give up on those dreams (aka: Grain & Grain) when the reality of this life and this moment, is the cage I must learn to live in.  There is no fun in dreaming dreams that hold no possibility and this is one of the biggest crimes against caring for someone with Alzheimer's and Dementia.  

As a caregiver, it's dangerous to believe in your own ideas because fantasies can break you.  I don't want to see the marketing materials full of smiling faces at assisted living centers or rehab hospitals or any other misguided sales pitch.  I want reality!  I want to see the real life of this disease like the moments captured by Upside Down Daughter.  Show me how bad it can get so I can understand my own capacity and develop a measure for when I need help.  I need to establish my own foundation and understand where it is weak.

The future is bleak for so many reasons but maybe those are projections too?  Maybe the face of pain is actually one of strength and all that work you managed prior to this moment is the foundation for a better you?  A foundation for a future that you are still building and doesn't need to make sense now because it's just the ground layer but its the work necessary to stabilize your future.  If I circle back to 17 years ago that Human Development and Learning degree really laid some ground work.  What at the time seemed the fastest exit strategy from college is now a tool for understanding aging, an interest I guess I have had all along.  That chef certification is used constantly and when combined with the human development knowledge I realize, maybe there is a place for me to help explain diet and age related illnesses.  Maybe social transformation exists within social media and these things are all working together to create my purpose?  Maybe Grain & Grain, my budding business idea of artisan bread baking and wooden spoon carving isn't a dream to abandon, but a passion to explore within the context of my current circumstance? 

What if we don't need to have everything all figured out? What if the quest for purpose isn't something you happen upon, but instead becomes you?  Like with carving spoons, life experience is a tool in the making, taking shape little by little until you have a handle on things and destiny is the dessert, a dessert you created yourself and is sweeter than ever.  Is this self care?  I don't know. I certainly don't have things figured out but as I listen in the stillness and try and calm the restlessness I have moments where I can reflect on my trajectory and I start to wonder if maybe, just maybe...I have arrived?

Sexy Fried Rice: A Recipe For Better Blood

Per request, I am adding this recipe to the mix and for good reason.  For one, this dish is loaded with blood boosting chlorophyll which is great for building blood as it stimulate the production of hemoglobin and two, it's just too easy to make not to share the details.  You can pack so many vegetables into a dish like this and it is a great way to diversify your veggie intake.  Really, you can make this with whatever you have in your fridge.  I went with the green theme here which is exceptional healthy for so many reasons it's hard to list them all, but what you really need to remember is that for all general purposes, use whatever you have on hand.  Fried rice is like the new pizza, where anything can be a topping. Even more importantly, fried rice can be a vehicle for a healthy dose of fresh goods.  Leave the canned mushrooms and water chestnuts in the pantry and go with the fresh stuff.  These are the ingredients that are going to contribute the most to your health and it's best to give them the run the house (aka: your body) without the hindrance of artificial ingredients, loaded with artificial chemicals that your metabolism struggles to recognize.   

Ingredients

• 3 eggs (or more if you like)
• 1 red onion sliced (because that is what I had but green could be fun!)
• 1 green bell pepper sliced into strips
• 1 head of broccoli cut into florets
• 1 handful of asparagus, tough ends removed and then sliced into 1.5 inch pieces
• 1 cup frozen peas
• 1 chicken breast sliced into small stir-fry type pieces (although, I used some leftovers from a rotisserie...)
• 3 cups of fresh spinach
• 1 clove garlic minced
• 1 inch piece of ginger pealed and minced
• 1/4 cup oyster sauce
• 2 TBSP soy sauce
• 4 cups cooked rice (it's best if the rice is made a day or so ahead of time)
• Oil as needed to keep everything from sticking

Directions

1. Prepare all ingredients first and keep them separated.
2. Mix the garlic, ginger, oyster sauce and soy sauce together and set aside.
3. In a large pan (a wok is ideal) add a little oil and scrabble the eggs till cooked and then place in a small bowl off to the side.
4. Next, saute the following vegetables one at a time adding oil as necessary: onion, pepper, broccoli, asparagus, and peas. Sauting seprately is important for controlling the final texture as different items will require different lenths of time to cook through.
5. After sauting each vegetable, you can place them into a large bowl (the veggies can all be combined at this point so one bowl will work for all).
6. Then saute the chicken (or any protein really). Once cooked through you can add it to the bowl of veggies.
7. Add about 2 tbsp of oil to your pan and then add the rice. Saute it for a bit breaking it up as best as possible.
8. Then add the soy sauce mixture and mix well with the rice.
9. Once the rice is mixed with the sauce add the chicken and vegetables to the pan and stir everything around and combine well.
10. Lastly, add the spinach. You might have to add a little at a time allowing the spinach to wilt some as you mix it in before you can add the rest.
11. Give everything a good stir to combine and you are done!

Let me just add some encouragement here that making this recipe is much easier than writing out this recipe.  You guys can wing this in a pinch so just go for it!  The key is truly having everything prepped before you start and then cooking items individually to control the final texture to your liking.  I hope this recipe is helpful and cheers to blood health!

Pantry Staple: Blueberries

Is it just me, or do we all suffer from berry rationing?  Every time I buy berries, I habitually dole them out as if to preserve them for future uses while foolishly limiting my in the moment consumption.  This habit is a bad habit and needs to end ASAP!

Blueberries should be binged upon. They contain anthocyanidins which is just a fancy word to describe the antioxidant compound that makes these little guys "superfoods."  And super they are!  Specifically, research has  shown the antioxidant in blueberries to protect the brain from oxidative stress helping to ward off age-related health conditions like Alzheimer's disease. Tufts University conducted a study that involved feeding older rats the equivalent of 1 cup of blueberry a day and "they showed significant improvements in learning capacity and motor skills making them mentally comparable to much younger rats." (The Encyclopedia Of Healing Foods, pg.259-260).  Blueberries have also been therapeutic in  addressing cataracts, glaucoma, peptic ulcers, urinary track infections and macular degeneration associated with diabetes.  The list gets longer but I think you get the idea.  More importantly, why isn't there such things as a Food Pharmacy where your health insurance would help pay for your prescription berries?!

Long story short, blueberries are food medicine and we need to be eating these gems aggressively! Eat them by the handfuls.  Throw some in a parfait, or on ice cream or toss into your baked goods.  It really doesn't matter.  Just get them down the hatch!  Here in this house, we are attempting to adopt a daily blueberry ritual in which we add them to our diet with regularity.  A  new family favorite includes these sourdough pancakes.  You can add them to your regular pancake batter but if you are really interested in the sourdough part, you can read about that process here. Now, go get some blueberries and indulge!

Making A Wild Yeast Sourdough Starter

Fermented foods are perfect examples of things getting better with age and since we are really living by the idea that old is gold, 2016 marked the birth date of the house sourdough starter. I have experimented with starters before however this attempt is the first time I have sought to capture wild yeast.  I make no promises but the bubbles above do show promise and assuming I can keep it alive, then we are in for a good year for sure!

Ingredients

• 1 cup flour
• 1 cup warm water

Directions

1. Combine the flour and water in a bowl and mix thoroughly
2. Cover with a towel or several layers of cheese cloth and leave to rest at room temperature for 24 hours.
3. After 24 hours check for a few bubbles starting to appear. This is a sign that yeast are becoming active and fermentation is starting.
4. Keep checking every 12 to 24 hours to ensure that more bubbles are forming and the process is developing nicely.
5. Once the bowl is full of bubbles it is now time to start "feeding" it daily.

Feeding The Starter

1. Add 1/2 cup flour and 1/2 cup warm water to a clean bowl.
2. Add 1/4 cup of starter to the bowl and mix to combine.
3. Cover with a towel or cheese cloth and let rest for another 24 hours and discard what is left of the old starter.
4. Do this daily until you notice a predicable rise and fall of the starter sponge which is an indicator that your starter is now mature and can be used as a leavener.
5. Another trick to test maturity is to drop a teaspoon of the starter into a cup of water and if it floats, it's ready! If it sink, then continue feeding it daily allowing more development to occure.

I am not the biggest fan of tossing out the unused starter so for avid bread bakers out there, I encourage you to incorporate these discards into whatever baking adventures you have in the works.  The daily feeding has really thrust me into my own baking challenge where my head is spinning as to how next I will use this goop. It's kinda fun, a bit like a low maintenance pet, and more than anything, it's encouraging me to make something daily.  

If you have experimented with wild yeast or starters or daily makings of any kind, I would love to hear about them!  I am on the hunt for ideas and inspirations both in the baking world but also in the sense of creating a routine or ritual.  It has been exactly one week into 2016 and although I don't want to put too much pressure on the idea of a resolution, I love the concept of a fresh start.  Starting a starter isn't exactly fresh but it still represents a journey into newness.  This starter might be a complete flop but I am trying to focus more on the act of trying and making an effort rather than any success or accomplishment.  Who's with me?

Eating Guidelines for Seniors

A while back I wrote several  mini articles on considerations to keep in mind when providing meals for seniors.  The series was titled "Rules For How To Feed A Senior" and identified four areas of concern that caregivers should be mindful of when assembling meals for the elderly. Those individual articles are still available on this site however I thought I would kick-off the New Year with a summary of those details in a single article for easy reference.  An easy trick for remembering these guidelines is the acronym "HATS".  

HATS stands for:

1. Hydration- Dehydration causes all sorts of issues from blood pressure complications, UTI's, falling, etc. Keeping seniors hydrated should be a top priority!
2. Appearance- As the expression goes "you eat with your eyes" so why not go the extra mile and make your gesture count. Presentation can go a long way when it comes to lifting spirits.
3. Texture- Diffuculty swallowing and poor teeth are common concerns for seniors. Keep this in mind when preparing meals. Tough, crunchy and chewy foods can be problematic.
4. Size- Seniors likely don't eat as much as they used to however balanced nutrition is still critical for optimal health. As portion sizes become smaller, caregivers should strive to uphold a well-rounded diet for those they are caring for.

Hopefully this posts is helpful for those of you managing a senior kitchen.  I look forward to sharing many new culinary crafts with you in 2016 and I would love to hear about things you are cookin' up!  Have a Happy New Year!

Persimmon Whip Recipe

Tis the season for persimmons, and anyone out there a little suspicious on how to incorporate them into your comfort zone, this recipe is sure to help.  Hachiya persimmons, hailing from Asia but commonly found in the USA are chalk full of vitamin A, vitamin C, potassium and copper.  You might be curious about that copper bit but the good news is copper is a great anti-inflammatory.  Alzheimer's and dementia are associated with inflammation of the brain so any ingredients contributing to a reduction of inflammation is a good thing.  The same goes for anyone trying to manage symptoms of arthritis.  Seek-out foods with anti-inflammatory properties as a natural approach to assist relief.  Every little bit helps, right?

Ingredients

• 1 ripe Hachiya persimmon
• the juice of 1 lemon
• 1 tsp of honey
• 2 tbsp of olive oil

Directions

1. Cut the persimmon removing the stem and seeds
2. Place in a blender along the other three ingredients
3. Puree until smooth and well combined
4. Taste and adjust slightly if necessary

Persimmon whip with plain Greek yogurt on 7 seed crackers.

The great thing about this recipe is its versatility.  It makes a great spread for crackers or sandwiches and it can be thinned with more oil and converted into a salad dressing.  There is a lot of potential with this whip and the season won' last long. Pick up some persimmons while you have the chance!

On Finding The Right Caregiver

Finding the right caregiver is no easy task.  If you land in the desperate position of needing someone ASAP, then take comfort in knowing that agencies exist with a hiring process so you can have supervision on the quick.  Trained personnel, armed with a client history and years of experience that enable you, the concerned one, to relax, well-assured of your loved one's safety.  That is of course until the possible realization that your newly hired help isn't exactly "helping".  Sure, your new assistant might contribute with drives to appointments, errands or even provide hygiene services but if it's not the right fit, then it is not the right fit. 

I went through an agency and two different caretakers before I realized what exactly I needed from an aid.  Things that sounded great on paper like registered, certified, or experienced didn't exactly translate into quality care.  My first two aids came with thick accents, iPhones and the expanse of knowledge one can only feel confident with when you are in your 20's.  The reputable labor and high price tag landed me with youthful strangers my parents could neither understand nor relate to, both engaging more with Facebook than my folks while I was out.  Sure, they assisted with those minor tasks and of course were able to address immediate safety concerns but at the end of the day I was looking for more. I craved a scenario that made my parents more comfortable at home and as comfortable as possible with their own evolving chaos with Alzheimer's and Dementia.

 Essentially, I was looking for someone who was a "substitute" me.  I had none of the above agency criteria that's supposed to make you feel better about hiring a stranger.  I am not registered with any such agency.  The only certificate I have exists by birth with absolutely zero relevance to my ability to perform specialized duties.  And as for experience?  Ugh... I guess you could say I have little to none?  However, for all intents and purposes, I am the best fit for this job.  I am the Primary Caretaker, Power of Attorney, Health Care Proxy, Estate Executor and perhaps most comfortably or awkwardly, I am their daughter.  Unfortunately, my extensive awesomeness is not enough and I needed to hire someone with the skills, compassion and integrity that were as close a match to my own while simultaneously finding someone with the strengths where I was weak.  I needed someone to engage with my parent, to help them with their struggles and act more like their companion than a complacent house-sitters.

Luckily, I eventually found this magical person and it was a hunt that lasted more than a year.  She is not from an agency but instead, she is from a place called Word of Mouth.  She engages my parents with art, puzzles and conversations that run in circles making absolutely no sense yet engages with a level of patience and kindness that far exceeds my own. She does incredible things like fancy up-dos with my mom's hair, helps her shower or get dressed and brushes and flosses her teeth!  I am not kidding about the flossing.  She takes great care in all 19 of them!!!

I can only pay her $15 an hour which is the standard rate in the caregiving field but I assure you she is worth every penny and so much more!  She is actually so good that I feel a twinge of shame that I can't do more for her because she is doing so much for me.  It is the shame that tells me I have found the right person, when every payday I hand over a check and it's a check that feels so meager in regard to her worth.  I often worry about the financial constraints of this disease and question our ability to afford and sustain quality care.  I actually question all kinds of things related to navigating this stuff and have no idea if I am making the right decisions or not.  I second guess myself constantly but not when it comes to Diane.  She is the right fit and I know this not only from my feelings surrounding pay concerns but more importantly the room she has created within our home to let in joy.

Thank you Diane! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!!  

Butternut Squash Soup Recipe

This butternut squash soups is a bowl of comfort that is easily kept warm in a crock pot so you can keep hungry folks fed and out of your kitchen in the midst of all the holiday cooking chaos. You can make it a day or two in advance and then keep it in the fridge until you’re ready. Then, just pour it into a crock-pot set to low the morning you want to use it, and allow it to warm-up for a few hours…

Boom! You got a low maintenance, seasonal lunch and free kitchen space! Holiday cooking is rarely low maintenance so anything that pays back in both space and time is worth it when it comes to your sanity. You can be “fancy” with a tray of topping on the side so everyone can add their own. Again, low maintenance for the win! Cause you probably still have pies and sides to make with a bird or something in your oven. Who needs the added stress of hungry people getting in your way? Just make this soup. There is a reason it’s considered comfort food.

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INGREDIENTS:

• 1 tbsp oil

• 1 butternut squash peeled, seeded and cubed into 1/2 inch pieces (about 3 cups total)

• 1 onion chopped

• 3 garlic cloves chopped

• 1 tbsp of fresh ginger

• 1 tsp curry powder

• 1 tsp turmeric

• 2 2/3 cups of broth (chicken or veggie)

• 1/2 can of unsweetened coconut milk

• 2 tbsp of plain yogurt

• splash of half and half

• 1 tbsp fresh cilantro

• some chopped cashews for topping

DIRECTIONS:

1. Saute the onion in a pot with the oil over medium heat until soft
2. Add the garlic and fresh ginger and cook for another minute or so
3. Add the turmeric and the curry powder and mix well
4. As the spices start to stick to the bottom, add a little broth and deglaze the bottom of the pot bringing up all those caramelized bits which will enrich the final flavor of the soup.
5. After deglazing you can add in the rest of the broth and the squash
6. Bring it up to a boil then reduce the heat and allow to simmer for about 10 or 15 minutes uncovered until the squash is tender
7. Remove from heat and allow to cool slightly and mix in the coconut milk. (If you have an immersion blender use that to puree the soup. If using a regular blender puree in batches but really allow the soup to cool).
8. When the soup is smooth, warm it back up, but be careful not to boil it because the coconut milk can curdle. Ladle into a bowl.
9. In a separate bowl, mix the yogurt and a little cream or left over coconut milk and make a thin finishing sauce. Stir a spoonful into you soup and top with fresh cilantro and cashews.

What holiday cooking strategies do you try and employ? I’ve got the soup covered but when it comes to the other items I could use some tips. Tell me, tell me!

Soaked 9 Grain Bread Recipe

Here is an easy bread recipe utilizing whole grains that does not come out dry.  Whole grains are a commonality for Centenarians (individuals over the age of 100) according to the Blue Zone which you can learn more about here and based on their dietary research it sounds like a good idea to consume more whole grans when possible.  However, breads with whole grains are often disappointing when you substitute them in a standard recipe.  The trick is to soak the course grains first then incorporate them into your dough while maintaining that high hydration level.  It is a bit time consuming, but it is incredibly low maintenance, so you have flexibility in how and when making this loaf might fit into your schedule.

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Soaker:

· ½ cup of 9 Grain Flour (or whatever your coarse grain flour is going to be)*

· ½ cup if water

Combine these in a bowl and let them rest for 6-8 hours or overnight.

*The flour I used here was given to me by a friend and freshly milled with a consistency that looked more like dry oatmeal than flour. It was extremely coarse but soaking it made it magical. Soaking coarse grains (like corn meal) will really make a difference as the grains soften and absorb water. This will keep the grains from drawing out moisture during baking so you don’t end up with a dry dense loaf.

Ingredients:

· ½ cup wet soaker

· 1 cup warm water

· ¼ cup Sorghum Molasses (you could also use honey)

· 1 tsp. salt

· ¼ tsp yeast

· 2 ½ cups flour

Directions:

• In a large bowl combine the soaker, water, molasses, salt and yeast.

• Then add the flour and mix until well combined and the dough starts to pull away from the bowl. The dough will be quite sticky and wet. Use a rubber spatula or bowl scrapper to help combine it. Do not use your hands! I repeat, do not use your hands!

• When all the ingredients are combined and you have what looks like a wet, gloopy blob, just cover the bowl with plastic wrap and let it rest on the counter to rise for 6-8 hours or overnight.

• After the dough has rested it should look more like a sponge and have doubled in size.

• With a wet hand reach into the bowl and carefully lift and fold the edges into the center, completely loosening the dough from all sides. The dough is so sticky that it can easily be lifted and folded into the middle; just keep your hand wet to keep the dough from sticking to you.

• Cover and let rest for another hour.

• Preheat your oven along with a deep dutch oven with a lid to 500 degrees.

• Carefully remove the dutch oven, spray it with some non-stick spray and with a wet hand gently assist the dough out of the bowl and into the dutch oven.

• Cover with the lid and place it into the hot oven and immediately reduce the temperature to 450 degrees and bake for 30 minutes.

• Remove the lid and reduce the temperature to 425 degrees and continue cooking for 10-15 more minutes or the internal tempurature reaches 190 degrees.

• Remove the bread from the oven and cool the loaf on a wire rack for 20 minutes if not longer before cutting into it. This is the hardest part!

Rules for "how to feed a senior..."

Rule #4: Make It Count

Late in life, after years of hard work, the least we can do is help our seniors feel like their time has been worth it.  There is no reason to reserve that fine china for some special occasion because this is the occasion!  If these days are final hours, then let's make it the grand finale! 

The day will come when I might also be too feeble to prepare my own meals, pick-out my own clothes or retain any capacity to make my own choices.   Relying on the hand of another can easily strip one’s identity as decisions are no longer of personal preference but rather the selections made by a caregiver. If and when that day comes I hope those giving hands carry tact and grace, with a healthy serving of flair and dignity so that I might enjoy the finality that lay before me.  We all need a little something to look forward to and ideally it will be sweet right up to the end!

Rules for "how to feed a senior..."

Rule #3: Size Matters

As senior mobility decreases and daily activities become limited, it is not surprising that appetites wane as the body has a reduced demand for calories.  Throw in the facts that appetites are often suppressed due to side effects of prescription drugs , anxiety around dysphagia (difficulty swallowing), weakening teeth and changing taste-buds, and it is no wonder that eating is no longer a thrill like days past.  However, it is still important that seniors consume enough calories to sustain their days, and more importantly, get the essential nutrients that allow their bodies' to thrive regardless of age.

Portion control plays an important role when you are assembling the senior plate.  Even though quantity has decreased, the nutrient density and diversity is as important as ever.  Protein, carbohydrates and fat all need to find there way on to the plate and ideally in each bite.  Sure, an older person might feel full after some mashed potatoes and therefore as a caregiver, it is easy to think you have done your job but if you are not providing meals that are a well-rounded composite of macronutrients then your are not enabling their body to preform at its optimal level of health.  Shoot for quality while aiming for comprehensive meals and forgo some of those concerns around how much they are eating. It's not the volume of food that is going to contribute to their well-being, but rather, the nutrient load they will receive with each bite. 

In case you are curious about what foods have the highest nutrient density you can check the the Aggregate Nutrient Density Index here which is a bit like like a report card for evaluating the micronutrients in fruits, vegetables, nuts, seeds, legumes, etc.  It's not a complete list but it's a start and a great place for developing the foundation of how to build the senior plate. 

Recurring Dream

This keeps happening.  Choking dreams... 

The peril for choking is always different and has evolved slightly over time however panic remains. The first ones I remember included sand.  Like being buried alive and relying on the air between those individual grains, always struggling to breath-in. Every breath was sharp and rough as the soft tissue of my lungs gathered harrowing abrasions.   But breathing… very heavy breathing.

Somewhere along the way this dream has changed.  I haven’t had the sand one in a while and the panic is no more about the strain of inhalation, but instead it’s coughing a substance out.  Lately, this substance takes the form of a melted, sticky kind-of tar. Often it is black and coats my tongue and throat, and my breath becomes forceful and heaving as I try to get it out.  It's that same lurching way that happens when you gag.  At times I wake-up, ripped from the dead of night.  The coughing is ragged and painful, but I have to get it out.  If I am lucky I might even vomit, because with that goes the adrenaline and after I can usually fall back asleep. 

Rules for "how to feed a senior"...

Rule #2: Hydrate!

Dehydration in seniors is a major concern.  It pretty much leads to problems you can imagine like dizziness and weakness but then there are a ton of others that you would never realize are connected. What really scares me is a Urinary Tract Infection.  Have you seen the movie Crash?  Do you remember how you hated Matt Dillon’s character as that horrible cop until they gave you a glimpse of his home life and saw the struggles he was up against with his father’s UTI?  So much perspective and all of it sad, sad, sad… 

The issues around incontinence are hard enough to deal with but dealing with a senior UTI freaks me out!  I can’t imagine it; I don’t want to imagine it and therefore we have all become a bunch of drinkers.  My mom is way into Diet Coke which I absolutely detest and can’t help but wonder if all that aspartame is somehow connected to her Alzheimer’s now.  Science maybe hasn’t said so, but it’s completely artificial and I don’t trust it.  Unfortunately, she is not all that impressed with water so it’s helpful to jazz it up a bit.  Garnishings can do wonders!  I doctor up a pitcher of water with whatever fruit I have on hand until it looks like party and then, wouldn’t you know it, everybody wants some.

Cheers!

Rules for "how to feed a senior"...

As I temporarily leave my parents in the care of other “givers” I have been answering a lot of questions around what they like to eat.  I realize a website titled “How To Feed A Senior” should probably clarify some of the rules around the “how-to” part.  In my experience I have come to learn that it doesn’t matter what you serve.  If it is difficult to chew, hard to swallow, or complicated to eat, it’s not going to work.  Issues around poor teeth, difficulty swallowing, and decreased motor skills all increase concerns around senior nutrition and complicate matters for caregivers. The next several posts will be dedicated to a few of the rules I have come to live by and will hopefully help others whom find themselves in the same position.

Rule # 1: Texture Matters

• Keep it soft- At this age the teeth are often in rough shape.  Many folks wear dentures or have teeth that have experienced neglect leaving the mouth sensitive and chewing stressful.  Chomping down on anything can be challenging and things like tough meats, corn on the cob, whole apples, large sandwiches, etc…  These things all put a high demand on the teeth.  Biting and chewing I have noticed are becoming increasingly more difficult.  It’s not to say that my dad doesn’t want a kobe steak, it just means I have to cut it up into small bites that aren’t going to overwhelm him when he has it in his mouth.

• Moist- I know people hate this word but too bad.  Moist is a must! As Alzheimer’s progresses, difficulty swallowing also known as dysphagia, can be a common problem.  This can easily lead to malnutrition and dehydration as those struggling with the condition avoid eating and drinking as the act of doing so physically becomes more difficult.  If you are having difficulty swallowing do you think a dry cracker or dinner roll is going to help?  No.  So, dry is out and moist is in!

Sundays...

Perhaps the Morrissey song is better titled because everyday really is like Sunday, but Willie does a better job defining the mood.  The mornings here are almost always good.  If there is ever an opposite of Sundowners then it should aptly be named Moon Stars Syndrome and refer to the casual awakening of possibility in a day. Spirits are always high, the coffee is always hot, and a runny yolk is almost always around the corner.

Caregiving gets a bad rap.  People don't realize the best parts of the weekend can be experienced every day.  Lazy mornings on the couch or awake but still in bed are comfortable routines anyone can get used to.  Time is for the taking and my thoughts are filled with what to make of what remains, a luxury my old life rarely afforded.  Obviously, all this idleness means it’s time to create this guy a garden! 

Cultured Butter Pie Crust Recipe

Using cultured butter in your pie crust is a great way to enhance your pie dough cause, lets be for real… Quality crust comes from using quality ingredients and banging butter don’t disappoint! Throw in the addition of cream cheese and you got recipe for culinary success. It’s a crust where texture meets flavor. Where Mmmmmm is matched with yum… And who are we kidding? Pie is always about the crust! So why not park the pie recipe for a moment and let crust have its moment in the spotlight! Seriously, I made hand pies instead of traditional pie because, crust, Crust, CRUST! It’s really all about the crust! That’s a pie’s foundations so it needs to measure up.

As I mentioned, there are two critical ingredients that make this crust a gem:

1.       Cream Cheese- For those of you already familiar with the thrills of cheddar cheese as a crust addition, then you will be excited to learn that cream cheese can similarly add depth to your flavor profile.  It also works to enhance the texture of the crust by adding lightness to the dough.  It responds like butter and is easily kneaded, so this is an obvious win!

2.       Cultured Butter- Does “cultured” really make a difference? Is it worth the higher price tag?  I would say “yes and no.”  You can certainly use regular butter in this recipe but if you want to stand out from the crowd, then cultures (aka: probiotics) are key, as they are truly magic makers, when combined with prebiotics which are commonly found in fruit and grains.  Cultured butter also has a higher fat content and is therefore lower in moisture which helps the crust in attaining that light and flaky texture.  (Ugh... and don’t get me started on “fat is bad” blah, blah…  If you still subscribe to that line of thinking, you can brush-up on your nutrition knowledge here.)

Ingredients:

• 2 cups flour
• Pinch of salt
• Pinch of sugar
• 1 cup cultured butter (unsalted)-softened
• 8 oz package of cream cheese- softened

Directions:

1. In a bowl combine the flour, salt and sugar and set aside.
2. In another bowl add the butter and cream cheese and mix thoroughly till combined.
3. Once mixed, slowly add your dry ingredients to the butter/cream cheese mixture, working it together to form the dough.
4. After the dough is formed and all the ingredients are fully incorporated, divide the dough in half and form two round disks.

5. Cover in plastic wrap and refrigerate for an hour or until you are ready to use.

   *I used one disk to make a bunch of the hand pies in the image above, and the other to make a top and bottom crust for a more traditional version of apple pie. Both were good, and really just a decision based on time. If you have the time, attempts some hand pies! They are fun and different.

Final Thoughts

Cultured foods like yogurt, kimchi, miso and kombucha have gained popularity after science has determined that live bacteria help support the development and maintenance of healthy gut flora.  Yes, it is possible that those bacteria are no longer living after baking but their contribution still plays an important role when it comes to flavor.  Baked or not, cultured butter deserves a spot in any kitchen!  You can always attempt your own version with this recipe. And if you really want hand pies, well I have a recipe for that too!

Golden Years

As modern media seems transfixed by capitalizing off youth, I have to wonder if I am considered past prime.  I am not even 40, yet the stereotypes that surround “mid-life” remind me I should prepare for an impending crisis.

 At some point, we as a culture have adopted the mentality that life should be figured-out about half way through, and any short comings of that projection are often internalized as failures.  But why are we so quick to adopt failure when the game itself isn’t over?  Half-way is really only part-way, with a substantial chunk still left.  What if the second half is the best half?

The modern portrayal of the “golden years” seems incredibly tarnished.  Seniors have been marginalized by fears of fixed-incomes, arthritis, and blood-pressure medication all indicating to a decline of old-aged comfort. The marketing tactics for seniors even perpetuate these fears dedicating advertising to pharmaceuticals, security systems, supplemental insurance plans and that b*tch who has “fallen and can’t get up!”   

Grey hair, wrinkles and everything else, can’t we find these things to be beautiful?  Isn’t there a place in our cultural mentality for sweetness where golden is really gold and not just a disguise for old?  I refuse to believe that old age can’t be something to look forward too.  One’s best years always need to remain on the horizon and serve as both a destination and a reminder that good things are still to come.  The saying suggests that “Life is sweet”, not youth, no matter how much the media tries to sell us this message.

So, if you care to share, please tell me what your finish line looks like?  Is it a vision of pill boxes and Depends because that is certainly not mine, no matter how mainstream that marketing gets.  Pills and adult diapers may very well be a necessity in my future, but they aren’t exactly the material of dreams.  Not at all! I want the fine china, and I want it every day!  I want hobbies and an early afternoon cocktail on a porch swing with a book.  I want to be able to get-up off the floor without help at any age and go to exercise classes even if they occur on a chair.  I look forward to the discounts because who wants to pay full price for [insert anything here].  And my early-bird special includes sushi not a Salisbury steak?  No, wait.  What is Salisbury steak?  Am I missing something here?  Should I want to want Salisbury steak? 

My point is the golden years should be the best of years and we as individuals and caregivers should strive to make that version of life possible.  Maybe it’s only a fantasy but at least it’s one to look forward to!